Why Does Orange Juice Come Out Of An Orange?

podcast Dec 10, 2019

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I love the title for this podcast and if you keep listening you’ll know what I am talking about. Today, I want to talk about how you can change your experience of your whole life with your mind. I am living proof of that. 

I, like most people, used to spend a lot of my mental energy focusing on the areas of my life that didn’t quite match the way that I wanted them to. I remember spending a lot of time growing up focusing on what I wanted to be different about my grades in school or my social life. I got decent grades and I had a great group of friends, but I was way more focused on why my grades weren’t better or why I wasn’t more popular.  This kind of thinking continued throughout my younger life.

No matter how good things were, there was always an underlying discontentment to my life. And this continued when I got married and became a mom. I spent a lot of my early adulthood focused on why I...

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The One Key to Emotional Resiliency

podcast self care Dec 03, 2019

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Today I want to talk about emotional resiliency.  Emotional resilience is when you are able to calm your mind after encountering a negative experience.  Resilience is a muscle that we need to build. So if you learn how to build this muscle, it will take less effort to get over the emotional punches that life pulls.

There is a strong connection between failure and resistance. In fact, failure is actually a requirement that is necessary in order to strengthen emotional resiliency, because unless you are willing to learn from your mistakes and learn how to rebound from failure, you can’t be resilient. If you are someone who lives life believing that failure is not an option, you can’t develop resilience because you can only take actions that result in a sure thing.  

You experience stress when your brain gets hijacked by the automatic thoughts of your Inner Critic.  And if your Inner Critic is in the...

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Failure is a Great Option!

failure podcast Nov 26, 2019

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Today I want to talk about one of my favorite topics, which is failure. The reason why it is one of my favorite topics is that a lot of you listening have designed your lives around avoiding failure at all costs.  And this has caused you to give up on your dreams, keep you from achieving success in a lot of areas of your life, may have you feel very stuck, and also have a lot of complaints about life.  

We have been taught to avoid failure since we were young. In school, you can’t fail a class or can’t fail a test.  That is considered very bad. I think my whole education growing up was about studying to get the grade, rather than to actually learn.  What would school have been like if we had been taught that failure just means that there’s more to learn? How much more fun would school be?  

Your fear of failure is what costs you your dreams.  For a lot of you, your fear of failure...

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What You Can Get From Failure

failure podcast Nov 19, 2019

Can't listen? Here's the transcript: 

Today I would like to talk about how failure can actually be one of the greatest gifts in our lives.  So many of my clients start out on their dethroning journey completely unaware that they have been living their lives trying to ward off all forms of failure. 

Why is that? Basically, fear of failure is really a fear of feeling any negative emotions. Most people don’t recognize that they are spending so much of their emotional energy trying to avoid feeling any emotions that feel uncomfortable. This has them scared to do anything that would risk failure.

At the heart of avoiding failure is a belief that you have to do something perfectly or you have to make sure it will go exactly as planned, or else you will feel a negative emotion that you don’t want to feel. And this is a direct result of your Inner Critic ruling your mind.

When our Inner Critic is in control of our minds, we feel out of control with our...

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How to Be At Peace With Your Body

body image podcast Nov 12, 2019

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This week we’re talking about how your relationship to food and your body is really a microcosm of your relationship with yourself. So let’s talk about your body thoughts--Even if you don’t have issues with weight, this is a very useful topic because much of what we experience about being alive takes place in our body. 

Our experience of everything in our life gets processed through our brain. Anything that happens throughout our day first gets interpreted by our thoughts. So when you’re talking about your body and what you think about your body, you are actually talking about your thoughts about your body. 

As we are looking at how to feel the way we want to feel in our lives, we need to resist the urge to trying to fix or change the outside world to try to fix how we feel.  In our culture, we are taught from a young age that the external world determines how we feel. First, we look to our parents...

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How Your Inner Critic keeps your success and Self-Confidence Elusive

career podcast Nov 05, 2019

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Today I want to talk about a phenomenon I see time and time again in my programs and in my corporate trainings: Highly successful, educated women who are leaders in their field and with their teams, who are feeling burnt out, overwhelmed and tired of trying to be more and do more so that they can continue to prove that they are a valuable member and making a bigger impact. 

So many of us can relate, whether you are a CEO or a stay at home parent. We live in a culture of scarcity that tells us either subtly or outright that we’re not doing enough, that we don’t have enough, and no matter what we are doing and do have, we’re not good enough. 

In my own life, I have to watch out for this constantly. Because if I am letting my Inner Critic rule my mind, I define myself and my worth by how much I am doing and how much of an impact I am making. It’s not my schedule that I need to keep my energy on....

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Why Your Emotional Intelligence Matters More Than Your IQ

 

Can't watch? Here's the transcript: 

Today, I want to talk to you about why emotional intelligence is the most important thing in determining your success in any area of your life and why it matters way more than your IQ. In our culture, we've learned to place a lot of value on success as being the thing that defines our happiness. And we were frequently asked as young children starting at a very young age, what do you want to be when you grow up?

Our education system focuses on getting the right grades so you can get into the right college so that you can get the right job so that you can make the right amount of money. And we worry about money and about success and about accomplishment. Starting at a young age, we try to find the exact path so as to make sure that everything in our life works out.

And this breeds a culture in which depression and anxiety have skyrocketed to unparalleled heights. Some studies even suggest that the average high school student today has the same...

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When Your Inner Critic Rules Your Love Life

podcast relationships Oct 22, 2019

 

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Today’s podcast is for those of you who are either looking for a partner in your life or you have a partner in your life and are unfulfilled in the relationship. 

First, I want to talk about how your Inner Critic plays matchmaker in your romantic life. For those of you who are in the dating world, whether you are single and looking for a relationship or you’re divorced, this is super important.

Most people think that the way to find a great relationship is to find someone out there who is really great. But here’s the problem with that--If you have an Inner Critic that is ruling your mind, you are making decisions in your relationship based on your Inner Critic’s deepest beliefs about you, about other people, about relationships, and even about what it is that you really want in a relationship. 

Because not only does your Inner Critic voice tell you who to date, but also who you deserve to date....

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What Do Butterflies and Relationships Have in Common?

podcast relationships Oct 15, 2019

 Can't listen? Here's the transcript: 

Hey dethroners!  I have been seeing so many butterflies around me lately--it’s insane! I mean, they fly right up to me while I’m walking. I have seen them come right up to my car window. And one day when I was sitting on a beach, I swear there were at least 10 different times that butterflies flew right up to where I was sitting. 

Now, I tend to look for spiritual meaning in my life, so I did some research about what it means spiritually if you see butterflies all around you. And basically, the spiritual meaning of the butterfly is all about personal growth, transformation, and paying attention to the areas in your life where there is a need for transformation. 

I found this beautiful quote that said, “Just when the caterpillar thought her life was over, she began to fly.” And this quote is SO important in allowing us to remain in a space of calm, peace and surrender as we are dealing with...

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The Real Reason Why You're Feeling Drained and Overwhelmed

parenting podcast Oct 08, 2019

Can't listen? Here's the transcript: 

Hey Dethroners!  I want to share with you how I have completely shifted my entire life by practicing designing my life from the future that I am creating. I am sharing this with you in the hopes that you can begin to notice where YOU are automatically engaged in the same conditioned habits of thinking that are keeping you stuck in your suffering. 

I think most of us would agree that the world that we live in today feels really out of control on so many levels. And it feels to me like more and more of us (and more and more of our kids) are so freaking stressed out, unhappy, overwhelmed. 

The thing I see over and over is that we are so conditioned to look to the circumstances of life to change so that we can FINALLY get the life we want. I was stuck for soooo long and I really didn’t see how stuck I was until recently.

I have been a psychotherapist with a private practice for most of my adult life.  And I really...

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