3 Strategies to Ditch The Mom Guilt

parenting Mar 13, 2019

You wanted to take time for yourself. You said you were going to do it. You even marked it on your calendar. But somehow....it didn’t actually happen. (Or worse, you held onto your self-care time and the mom-guilt came along for the ride.)

As mothers, we are used to endless responsibilities. We’re masters at managing multiple moving pieces - all the time. So why does self-care slip through our fingers so easily?

Here’s the simple answer: When you’re chasing the impossible expectations and ideals that come with motherhood, you set yourself up to fall short. And when you’re frustrated with yourself for not measuring up, it’s easy to feel undeserving of self-care.

This all too familiar sequence of events can usually be attributed to our dear, old friend: the Inner Critic.

For the average mom, the role is synonymous with less than 32 minutes of solo time per day, says a recent study.

No wonder that leaves us Mamas lingering an extra luxurious...

Continue Reading...

007 Equipping ourselves (and our children) to find courage

parenting podcast Sep 04, 2018

 

In this episode of the Dethroning Your Inner Critic Podcast, Emily and Joanna are chatting with Cherylanne Skolnicki. Cherylanne is the founder and CEO of Brilliant Balance, a personal development company dedicated to helping high-achieving women have a balanced life while developing a plan to reach their peak potential. Their programs help women develop a blueprint for the life they want, and our community and coaching calls provide guidance and support to build momentum for their personal action plan.

 

During our discussion, we’re chatting about:

  • What stands between us and our full potential
  • Finding the courage to find our “something more”
  • Understanding our Inner Critic is NOT who we are
  • The most important education we’ll ever give our children
  • Deciding we want something...and going for it

 

Key Takeaways:

You have to be ready to suspend your disbelief that this is possible.


Connect with Cherylanne:

Free rebalancing guide: ...

Continue Reading...

Are You Parenting From Love or Fear?

parenting Apr 11, 2018

Click here to listen to the blog

 Hey Dethroning Tribe!

This weeks message is a special shout out to all you parents out there. As parents, we dream about who our children are going to be, how they might be like us, how they might be different from us, and how we can raise them to be happy and successful in life.  While this dreaming is a normal part of parenthood, many of us wake up one day only to realize that our children are just different than what we expected.  

Because we have expectations of who we want our children to be, and how we want them to behave in their lives, when they don’t fit this picture, we may automatically react from a place of trying to fix or change them to fit our expectations. If we can’t fix or change them, we may feel that we have failed as a parent, or are not doing a good enough job in raising our children. And as our children continue to grow, our fear of messing them up can continue to grow, too. Sound familiar? You are...

Continue Reading...

5 Steps To Dethrone Your Crazy “Bad Mom” Inner Critic

parenting Oct 25, 2017

I have been waiting for the premier of the movie “Bad Moms” all summer long.  I have heard fellow moms talking about it for months, rallying packs of moms together to see this movie.  So, I was so excited when I finally went to see it last week.  I wanted to find out why it is that this movie is resonating with so many women in a way that no movie has done in years.

This movie really hit home for me, as a therapist who has helped thousands of moms struggle with feelings of guilt and inadequacy, and as a mom of three kids.  It also hits home with millions of moms out there who struggle with the feeling that they have no idea what they are doing, and they are not doing a good enough job.

Motherhood has become an all encompassing identity. Moms feel that it is their fundamental role in life to be the “ideal mom”:  To do it all, know it all, BE it all, and make sure your kids turn out the way you want them to!  This role has...

Continue Reading...

5 Tools To Separate You From Your “Bad Mom” Inner Critic

parenting Oct 25, 2017

Your inner critic convinces you that you have to keep doing more, being more, knowing more, in order to feel like you are a good mom.  The minute you meet her expectation of who you are supposed to be, that is quickly yesterday’s news, and she is already on to the next problem you have to solve, the next mountain you have to climb, the next milestone you have to make your child reach.

The truth is that the feelings of inner peace, joy and contentment that all moms crave, come from learning how to separate yourself from your inner critic.  It’s about learning the tools to stop giving energy and attention to the critic’s attempts to improve, perfect, fix or change either you or your children.

Here are 5 tools to separate YOU from your “BAD MOM” INNER CRITIC:

1.    What is the story your inner critic has been telling you about the mom that you are?  Pay attention to the areas where you are struggling or suffering the most in...

Continue Reading...

When You Wake Up On Mother’s Day and Your Kids Are On Their Phones

gratitude parenting Oct 01, 2017

Have you ever felt like life can be like Groundhogs Day? We wake up thinking that today will be just another day, just like every other day. We wake up thinking about what we have to do, what we haven’t done, what we are or aren’t happy about, or who we’re not happy with.

We get stuck on autopilot, and day after day, life seems to be the same old, same old.

What most people are unaware of, is that today is not just another day. In fact, we never stop to think about the fact that today is the only day we are ever given. When tomorrow comes, it will be today. Yesterday no longer exists. The only place where our life actually occurs is today.

What would happen if you were to choose, at this very moment, on this very day, to be grateful? To actually open your heart to the blessings that you have in your life right now? How would your experience of yourself, your relationships, your entire life transform?

On Mother’s Day, I woke up feeling like Groundhogs Day.

My...

Continue Reading...

Parenting From Love and Compassion

parenting Oct 01, 2017

We all want our kids to grow up to be successful in life.  So much, in fact, that our Inner Critics often hijack our thought process with “What if’s”.  What if they don’t get good enough grades to get into a good college?  What if they don’t have enough friends?  What if they dress all in black when they’re 16?  What if I’m not doing enough as a parent to help them succeed?

Parenting from this place of fear creates much of the drama, stress, and pressure between us and our kids.  Our Inner Critic creates our own internal anxiety by convincing us that we need to “make sure” that our kids turn out to be “successful”.   We focus on measurements of their success:  grades, sports performance, groups of friends, appearance.  We don’t recognize that this is our Inner Critic’s agenda, that it is an illusion to think that we can fully control how our children turn out.

...

Continue Reading...
Close

50% Complete

Two Step

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.